Every time I go back to Sweden, I come home with more than just a suitcase.
I come home with questions.
Not because anyone is trying to interrogate me, quite the opposite. It's usually over coffee with family, a walk by the sea with a friend, or around the dinner table. Someone will ask, "So, how are things going?" or "How's the business?" and before long we're talking about life.
This time, those conversations stayed with me.
From the outside, I think my journey probably looks quite straightforward. I moved to Ireland. I started making shampoo bars. I built a business. Eight years later, Janni Bars has grown into something I could never have imagined when I poured my very first batch.
It's a lovely story.
It's also only a tiny part of the truth.
Because the truth is that nobody really sees the life between the big decisions.
People remember that I moved country. They remember that I started a business. They see new products launching, awards, new packaging, or another milestone online.
What they don't see are the hundreds, maybe thousands, of tiny decisions that quietly connected those moments together.
The conversations with myself.
The moments of doubt.
The times I changed direction.
The evenings spent wondering whether I was making the right choice.
The decisions that nobody else even knew I was making.
Looking back, I've realised that life isn't really built around the obvious milestones. It's built in everything that happens between them.
Moving to Ireland was undoubtedly one of the biggest decisions I've ever made.
At the time, though, I don't think I fully understood what it would become.
I wasn't moving here because I had a business plan tucked into my suitcase. I certainly wasn't imagining that one day I'd be writing a blog from my workshop in County Longford, making products that would end up in bathrooms all over Ireland and beyond.
I was simply brave enough to try something different.
I don't even know if I thought I'd stay forever.
I just knew it felt like the right next step.
Looking back now, it's impossible not to wonder what life would have looked like if I'd stayed in Sweden.
Would I have started Janni Bars?
Would I have found the confidence to work for myself?
Maybe.
Maybe not.
It's not that Ireland somehow made me entrepreneurial, or that Sweden wouldn't have. I don't believe that for a second.
But changing countries changed me.
Sometimes we don't realise that we're changing until years later.
One decision quietly leads to another.
One opportunity creates the confidence for the next.
Before you know it, you're living a life that would have been impossible to imagine all those years ago.
That's what those conversations back home made me realise.
People often tell me they're proud of what I've built, and hearing that never gets old. It means more than they probably know.
But it also makes me smile because they're seeing the finished picture.
They aren't seeing the hundreds of brushstrokes underneath.
Anyone who has followed Janni Bars for a while knows that I don't often pretend everything is easy.
There have been plenty of moments where I've questioned myself.
There have been financial worries, production problems, delays, mistakes, launches that didn't quite go to plan, and days where I wondered whether I was capable of carrying on.
Even now, I still overthink decisions far more than I'd like to admit.
Some days they're tiny decisions.
Some days they feel enormous.
The funny thing is, I've realised I usually know the answer much sooner than I allow myself to believe.
Intuition has quietly guided many of the biggest moments in my life.
Logic has its place, of course.
Research matters.
Advice matters.
But somewhere underneath all of that is usually a quiet voice that already knows which direction feels right.
Learning to trust that voice has probably been one of the hardest lessons of all.
Something else became clear to me while I was in Sweden.
Life has a funny way of convincing us that we're always waiting for something.
Waiting until work is less busy.
Waiting until we have more money.
Waiting until the children are older.
Waiting until everything feels settled.
The problem is, life rarely stays still long enough for that perfect moment to arrive.
I've realised that if I waited until everything was perfectly organised before enjoying my life, I might never get around to enjoying it at all.
Maybe that's why I've built this business the way I have.
People sometimes assume I always wanted to be an entrepreneur.
The truth is, I wanted to build a life that suited me.
The business came from that.
If I'd set out with a grand business plan, a goal to build a huge company or sell it one day, I think Janni Bars would look very different today.
Growth has always been important to me, and it still is.
I'm ambitious.
I want this little business to keep growing because I genuinely believe the products deserve to reach more people.
But not at the expense of the life I'm trying to build alongside it.
Because I only get one life.
That thought feels even stronger after spending time back in Sweden.
There's something about being close to the sea, sitting outside on a bright summer evening that seems to last forever, and catching up with the people who've known you since before any of this existed.
It reminds you who you were before the labels.
Before "business owner."
Before "founder."
Before all the responsibilities.
It reminds you that success isn't just about building something impressive.
It's about building something that allows you to live well.
For me, that means being outdoors whenever I can.
It means time with my horses.
It means family.
It means creating products I genuinely believe in.
It means feeling proud of my work without letting it become my entire identity.
I'm not always good at that.
In fact, I'm probably still learning.
But I think I'm heading in the right direction.
If this trip reminded me of anything, it's that none of us really know which decision will shape the rest of our lives.
Sometimes the obvious ones do.
Sometimes it's the quiet ones that follow.
What matters is having the courage to keep making them.
To keep adjusting.
To keep choosing the life that feels most like your own.
When people ask me how things are going, I suppose that's my real answer.
The business is growing.
The products are improving.
There are still challenges every single week.
But beneath all of that, I'm slowly building a life that feels right for me.